August 24, 2016
Talk About It
August 14, 2016
The Marathon
To prepare for surgery I decided I would make and freeze two months worth of food ahead of time. What an undertaking that was! It took a lot of planning and budgeting, but this past week I was able to get all the supplies and then I spent three days cooking it all. I spent under $300 and made 96 healthy meals. A lot of people have asked how I did this, so Ive typed up my recipes and master grocery list to share here.
A photo posted by Julie Albers (@julie_albers) on
July 11, 2016
CT Results
1- You're fine, no surgery needed
2- It's not so good, you might need surgery by next year, we'll keep an eye on it
3- It's bad, we should operate as soon as we can
It shouldn't be a surprise by now, but I got the third one.
The CT scan showed what the X-ray was hiding. While the fused bones connected around the edges, there is a gap between the bones on the inside, with no indication that they were fusing.
Imagine you have a bone, and its broken. You walk on it every day. There are three screws and some sliveres of bone growth holding it all together, but it's broken inside. That's what I've been walking on for the last four months.
I'm mad. Mad at my body for being so stubborn and not healing. Mad at God for thinking I should handle this. Mad at my health insurance, or lack thereof. I don't wanna hear any more platitudes. No more people saying "Stay positive" Stay positive about what?!? This sucks!! It's ruined my whole life! I'm not always a monster of negativity, but I need people to just let me feel my feelings, good or bad.
I'm not mad at my doctor. He's just as bummed about this as I am. He's not arrogant about it either. He truly wants to give me the best outcome possible.
It was a bad break. There's no blame, no faults. Everyone needs to stop suggesting that I sue the city or sue the hospital.
June 13, 2016
"Breaking" News
I fell.
I landed on my hands and knees pretty hard with my bike underneath me, my left hand getting twisted in the spokes of my wheel and my knees scraping the pavement. I was already late for my appointment and really embarrassed by my graceless fall, so I hurried in. Once I got settled in the clinic, I realized my left hand was throbbing really bad and swelling up. My physiotherapist took a look at it, icing it for a bit and then poking it while I cried. He said I needed x-rays.
So after physio I went to the Emergency Room. As much as I hate hospitals, none of the clinics nearby had x-ray machines. Interestingly, this was not the same hospital where I went for my broken leg. The wait was forever and the anxiety made me wanna run home. The triage nurse called my wrist "gross". The x-ray tech apologised for making me cry. The doctor I saw said that I had fractured a teeny tiny bone in my wrist called the scaphoid, but she didn't know how bad. These kinds of fractures are really hard to see on x-ray until after they start healing. Based on my swelling, bruising, where my pain is, and how I fell, she was sure it was a scaphoid fracture.
I got sent to Ortho to have a splint put on my arm. I have to go back in two weeks for a check-up. Until then I'll have to make do with a useless left hand, but at least it's a perpetual thumbs up.
June 6, 2016
Six Months Post-Fusion
Anyways, I didn't hear what I wanted to hear at my appointment today. The pain I feel in the joint has not calmed down at all. Physio is helping with the tendonitis but my surgeon was skeptical about my x-rays. So he's sending me for a CT scan for a more detailed look at the bone growth, and if he's not happy with it then I'll need another surgery to revise the fusion. Fifth time's the charm. No?
Usually ortho surgeons like to wait a year before touching a fusion, but I'm not as healed as I should be for six months, and the doc said if there's a problem he would rather deal with it sooner.
Surgery would push back returning to school. I would need more physio. I've maxed out my physio for the year, and next year I'm off my parents insurance.
I'm frustrated. I'm not a whiner. I've pushed myself so hard to get through this. I work hard in physio. I wear proper shoes and take it easy when I've pushed too hard. I've tolerated pain for so long.
I just wanted to hear that it would all be over soon.
January 16, 2016
Everything is Awful
Being in a wheelchair makes me feel really isolated. School has started and I'm in new classes with new students. I'm finding it really hard to get to know the new people. I feel like they see the wheelchair first. Also being on a different level than them physically makes talking to people hard, and sometimes intimidating. Everyone towers over me. I feel small. I also feel like everyone watches me. I don't like that feeling. I'm in one of the larger sections of my program, there are 30 of us.
I got through the first week but it was so hard. I'm finding it really hard to concentrate in class. I'm constantly in pain. I'm always tired. By the time I get home from class, I'm so exhausted I fall asleep. I haven't gotten any homework done all week.
The Lyrica is messing with my mood. Known side effects include anxiety and depression: things I already struggle with but had under control. Had. Not anymore. I get anxious at school, and I feel so alone that I start to cry. I feel hopeless and overwhelmed.
I've thought about dropping out. My parents said they will support me no matter what I do. They know my health is more important than school.
I haven't decided what I'm going to do. I want to give it a bit more time, see if anything gets easier. I have until January 22nd to get a full tuition refund.
Basically, everything is terrible right now.
January 9, 2016
Screws and Back to School
Well this is what a fused ankle looks like. Its pretty screwed up! Haha! Dr. Steeves said he would do an isolated fuse so he didn't go through my fibula. Thats good because I'll have slightly more flexibility. All those little bits of metal are left over from previous surgeries, and are never coming out.My pain is... interesting. Most of my discomfort is actualy in my foot as a result of nerve pain. I have one long incision and eight small ones, but I can't feel them, most of my foot and ankle are still numb. I do however, feel some very painful pins and needles once in a while.
I go back to school in a few days. I'm a little worried about it, I've only gone out three times since the surgery, and each time has been really hard and draining. Luckily I have a friend to drive me to school all semester, and in return, I got her a sweet reserved accessible parking spot on campus. But my schedule is heavy, and most days I'll be at the school for over 8 hours. It sounds a little overwhelming, but I just have to go for 15 weeks and then I get four months off!
January 3, 2016
Detox
They are 325mg Tramadol pills, I was talking up to 12 pills a day. Got down to 6, one very 4 hours. I haven't taken any since 7am yesterday. It's 2:30 am now. I've been relying on Advil and the Lyrica for pain control. Now I just need something for withdrawal control.
I see my doctor in 3 days.
January 2, 2016
Late Night Ramblings
I sleep on a weird schedule. It's been over two weeks of being in bed, and taking narcotic pain meds that make me fuzzy and sleepy. I sleep for four hours, and then I'm up for four hours, sleep four, awake four...
I miss my life. I'm anxious to get back to it. Right now my family is out of town visiting my Grandma, and attending my cousins wedding. I wish I could have gone.
I'm also anxious to go back to school, but I feel like I need to get off the meds first. I tried a couple days ago but the pain got really bad.
I also wanna go back to physio. I wanna walk, I wanna run, I wanna play volleyball and dance with more than just my arms.
But for now I binge watch Netflix, play app games like Plague Inc and Neko Atsume, and have various people over to clean my house and feed me.
Had I know when I woke up on March 29th 2014 that I would break my leg and ankle in such a way that it would affect the next two years of my life... would I do anything different? Would it even have made a difference? Can fate be changed?
January 1, 2016
Christmas, Bed Rest, and Cats
![]() |
| The mug speaks the truth |
![]() |
| December 24th vs December 29th |
![]() |
| Tramadol, Lyrica, and Advil |
I’m happy to have the cats, and I’m happy when friends come visit, but I cant wait to get out of this bed, get off these drugs, and get back to school and my life.
Julie
December 23, 2015
Night at the Montfort
Yesterday my wonderful sister organized a family gingerbread house decorating activity. So I was up and about all day. I had the wheelchair, but I was pretty active and rolling myself around and hanging out with my family. It really wore me out so at the end of the day when I felt like crap, I though I had just over done it a bitThen in the evening I was changing the bandages on my leg because my incisions had oozed through them. When I unwrapped my foot it was huge, angry red and very hot. When I touched the skin it hurt like a thousand tiny stabbing knives. My dad was worried about infection, and so was I. We decided to go to the emergency room.
We got there at about 11pm. I got registered and then waited. And waited. It was night time and there was only one doctor on staff and something like 13 ambulances came in during the night. My dad eventually fell asleep in a chair but my pain kept me awake. It was a good thing I brought my meds with me because I need to take my painkiller every 4 hours or my whole leg would feel like its gonna explode. Throughout the night I had interesting conversations with some other patients, mainly this one guy who had a nasty cut on his hand and was probably gonna lose his finger. I also got my dad to change the waiting room tv channel to Discovery Channel, but they were marathoning a show about Hawaiian kayak fishing and by the time I got bored of it, dad was already asleep. I eventually sent him home at 5am.
I finally got called into the clinic at 7:30am. By then the day staff had arrived, and there were more doctors and nurses available. I got put into a room and a nurse took my vitals again and said the doctor would be in to see me soon. Even though I had a bed I still couldn't sleep. At about 8:30 I saw the ER doctor. He unwrapped my foot and looked at it. He said my blood pressure was a bit high and my foot looked really bad. He said he didn't know why it was so red only in that one spot, no where near the incisions. He said that Dr Steeves, my surgeon, was on call and that he would just have him come see me. In the mean time, he ordered an IV for antibiotics and blood tests.When the nurse came in to put my IV in and take blood, she said I'd have to go to another waiting room while the IV went through. They needed the bed. After getting all hooked up, she wheeled me to a waiting room. I was there for only 15 minutes when the ER doc came and found me. He said that Dr Steeves was in surgery, but would be out in about an hour and would come see me right away. I thanked him, and then I asked if there was somewhere I could lie down. At this point, I had been awake for over 24 hours. He said he would see what he could do.
Only a few minutes later a different nurse came to me. She was so nice! She couldn't get me a bed, but she could get me a reclining chair, almost as comfy as my grandmas La-Z-Boy chair. She also got me into a smaller waiting room where there was no one else and it was quieter and I could have the lights off. I asker her if I could have a blanket, but I was so tired that I couldn't finish the sentence without breaking down in tears. She actually was really comforting and put her hand on mine and re-assured me that I would be okay and that it was normal to feel so overwhelmed after being awake for so long. Then she brought me a warmed blanket. I got comfy and finally closed my eyes.When I opened them again it was 10:30 and Dr Steeves was flicking on the light. "So I hear you have some ugly toes" he joked. I was still so exhausted, I just groaned. "Wow, you are not your usual self, something is up." I love when doctors care and can tell when you're not well. He took a look at my foot. He said my post-op x-rays were very good and my ankle was stable. The surgical sites themselves were healing well and not infected. But the amount of pain I was experiencing from the swollen red parts of my foot were concerning. He touched my foot and I cried. He asked if it was like a stabbing pain, and I said it was like a thousand fiery little knives were stabbing my foot. My pain was a 6/10 even though I was on the max dose of Tramadol. He said that the Tramadol probably wasn't helping with the pain in that part of my foot because it was something called neuropathic pain. The nerves in my foot were damaged and trying to heal, causing pain and swelling. Also several areas of my foot and leg were still numb and I couldn't move my toes. The redness was from blood pooling in my foot when it wasn't elevated all day. He said it would eventually turn brown before fading. Gross. Dr Steeves prescribed a new med to take with the pain med I was already on. Its called Lyrica and stops pain signals in the brain. He also said I had to keep my leg elevated above my heart, and that I should be on bedrest for the next two weeks.
I thanked Dr Steeves. He said he would get me back to good. After he left the nice nurse came back. She said she had checked on me a couple times before Dr Steeves arrived but I was out of it. She said she hoped I had a good rest and would be able to get more at home. She took out my IV and then wheeled me all the way to the mail lobby where I could get a cell signal. She even stayed with me until I had made some calls and got a ride home.
My dad picked me up at 11:30, so he probably got 5 hours sleep. I got home at noon and dad went to fill the new prescription. After he dropped that off, I fell asleep and didn't wake up until 5:30 this evening.
My surgery was only a week ago today.
December 20, 2015
Pre-op X-rays
The last x-ray I posted was from February. This one is form November. Some of the screws broke, but most concerning in this x-ray is where the tibia and talus are touching, and the dark shadow underneath. Thats the arthritis.
Anyways, recovery is going okay. I sleep a lot and my sister is here to take care of me while my roommate is home for the holidays. It doesn't feel like Christmas though.
December 19, 2015
Never Say Never - Surgery Number Four
![]() |
| X-ray from surgery #3 |
At the end of September I had a check up with Dr. Steeves. My x-rays showed that my ankle bone, the talus, was ever so slightly out of place. With the fibula where it should be, it was causing the tibia and talus to grind together and the resulting arthritis was already showing up on the x-rays. It also explained my chronic pain and the swelling. We tentatively booked a surgery date for the first week of my winter break, and made an appointment for November, to see if anything improved or got worse.
In the time leading up to that appointment, my physio coverage ran out and I actually became more active on my feet due to my busy school schedule. I started to have more bad days than good ones. Some days were so bad I had to use the walking cast because I just couldn't afford to take the day off. November came and the x-rays showed I had barely any cartilage left in the joint and the arthritis was deep. Dr. Steeves and I decided to go ahead with surgery. The plan: fuse the talus and tibia.
So on December 16 2015, almost two years after first breaking my leg, I went under the knife for the fourth time.
![]() |
| Dr Steeves and I |
Because of these past complications, they decided to admit me into the hospital overnight for this surgery. The operation itself took about three hours. Dr Steeves explained that they would be opening my old incisions and taking out my old metal, making a couple small incisions for the scopes so they could cut away the bone from around the damaged joint before fusing it together with a few screws. In addition to the nerve block behind me knee that lasts a day or so, my anesthesiologist added a long-acting morphine to my spinal, and an anti-anxiety med to the sedation. This time I stayed asleep and didn't freak out.
I went into surgery at 11:00 am and I woke up in the recovery ward at around 4:30 in the afternoon. The nurse observing me was really cool, we got to talking about photography and my family. I was waking up much better than last time and I wasn't in any pain because of the morphine and the nerve block in my knee. After an hour or so under observation they took me to a room on the surgical ward. Thats when things got rough. My oxygen was low so they had to put the air tube around my nose again. My blood pressure was really low, I got really itchy from the meds, and I was really nauseous and dizzy. I was able to eat a bit at first, but then I threw up on a nurse. I also couldn't fall asleep, so they ended up putting like four different meds in my IV for itching, sleeping, nausea, and an antibiotic. At midnight I still hadn't been able to go to the washroom on my own and the ultrasound showed my bladder was very full. So I had to get a catheter put in.
![]() |
| Hospital selfie |
Now I'm home to recover over the winter break. I go back to school in three weeks, but I have to spend the next 10-12 weeks completely off my leg! That means wheelchair and crutches and not walking on my own until March. I have a follow up appointment in a couple weeks. I'll try to remember to update here with x-ray pictures.
March 22, 2015
No More Surgery!
So I've been focusing on school. Its almost finals, so ill keep this short. Ill post more when I have free time. (Probably April)
February 18, 2015
Homework
- Business stationary set (letterhead, business card & envelope)
- Colour still life study
- App icon designs
- Drink menu design
- Portfolio pages x5
Today I took a few steps with the help of a cane. Just a few and then I got sore. But hey, that's progress. Tomorrow I'll take some more and maybe Friday I'll be able to walk all I want.
![]() |
| Assignment 2 of 5 |
February 17, 2015
Reading Week
February 14, 2015
Day 8 - A HeartHappy Valentines Day
![]() |
| A Heart Attack <3 |
Mood: Feelin' the love
Appetite: CHINESE FOOD
Progress: Got my avatar to level 5 in Skyrim
Today was pretty interesting. My friends Michael, Ethan, Meghan and Carley stopped by for a bit. Meghan stayed over to hang out and then the sister missionaries from church came over and spent some time with us. Then after the sisters left, we discovered we had bean "Heart Attacked".
![]() |
| Best roommate ever!! |
A huge shout out to my bff Carolyn and my roommate Ana. They have been doing so much over the last week to take care of me. Ana even did my eyebrows!!
I gave Hello Kitty valentines to all my friends :)
February 13, 2015
One Week After Surgery
Mood: Blahhh
Appetite: Its back
Progress: swelling is way down
![]() |
| I got my bandages changed since they were so loose. |
I spend my time playing Sims, Mario Kart, and Minecraft. I browse meme blogs and creep Facebook. My mind is full off fuzz. My leg feels like its full of knives.
I dunno, I just feel zoned out. I didn't wake up until 1pm today.
Whatever.
February 12, 2015
Day 6 of Recovery
Mood: Anxious about missing so much school
Appetite: Starting to feel hungry sometimes
Progress: I went outside
![]() |
| The Air Cast. I change up the colors of the straps every so often |
On my way out of the doctors office, my crutch slipped, and I fell on my bad leg. That really hurt. The crutch also pushed up on my arm and now my shoulder is sore. No more adventures for me.
Before going home, I stopped at the college. I got an email saying I had won the Nepean Ben Franklin Bursary, and I was awarded over $600. So I picked that up and deposited it. Yay money. I miss school.
Tonight the missionaries are coming over for dinner. Carolyn is making a breakfast buffet with pancakes, eggs, sausages and hash browns. I'm looking forward to it! My roommate Ana and our friend Conner will also join us.
February 11, 2015
Day 5 of Recovery
Mood: lazy
Appetite: I miss food
Progress: I pooped
![]() |
| The new medication schedule and a little school pride |
Today the pain hasn't been to bad. Sister Adams helped me get a shower and after that I was so exhausted, like I had run a marathon. But I felt clean. After the shower she changed my dressing. My leg really hurt after that.
The Benadryl makes me sleepy. I slept all night and all day and I'm still tired. I worry about all the school work I'm not doing. I just don't have the ability to concentrate or be creative. my mind is blank, my thoughts are blah. I just super sleepy.
I felt a little hunger for the first time after I pooped. but not since. I eat when people tell me to, but if they didn't I probably wouldn't. There's so much I cant do for myself. I can't cook or clean or even fill my water bottle.
February 10, 2015
Day 4 of Recovery
Mood: mellow
Appetite: still nothing
![]() |
| No plaster cast, but I do have the Air Cast. I have to wait for the swelling to go down before I can put it on though. |
I'm pretty much out of it concerning my cognitive abilities. Time goes by at weird paces. I find it incredibly hard to concentrate on anything. Ill find myself staring at a spot on the wall and next thing I know three hours have passed. or I'll go down for a nap and wake up ten minutes later feeling like I've slept for days. Sometimes I get impatient and frustrated by the smallest things. Like how my phones touch screen doesn't recognize my finger when its cold. I cried over that one.
I don't get hungry. I don't feel anything in my stomach wanting for food. I drink a lot of water because my mouth is dry, and I have to pee all the time. But I never feel hunger. I feel the effects if I don't eat, like I'll get the shakes and a low blood sugar headache if I don't have anything for a while, but just the thought of most foods make me feel queasy.
Anyways, enough updates for today. I'm sleepy.
February 9, 2015
Day 3 of Recovery
Mood: Kind of cranky and impatient
Appetite: Nonexistent. I have to force myself to eat.
Progress: I can wiggle my toes.
![]() |
| A happy drugged up Julie |
I'm going to try and post every day, just a short checkup so I can track my progress.
Until tomorrow
February 6, 2015
Surgery #3 - Waking up on the table
![]() |
| Pre-Op Smiles :) |
![]() |
| Dr Steeves initials the leg to be operated on. |
I said "Can I go back to sleep?"
"Are you awake?" he asked.
"Yeah. But I want to go back to sleep. I'm not done." I wasn't really panicking about being awake on the table.
"Okay were working on it. Just hang on." he said. Then I hear Dr. Steeves voice. I couldn't see him, the blue sheet blocked everything.
"Do you like the music?" he asked me.
"No" I whined.
"Why not?"
"I don't hear any music." Maybe my brain just couldn't process music at that point, because I don't remember music. I wish I did. Maybe I can pick the playlist for my next surgery.
I started to cry. I wasn't in pain, I didn't feel anything. I just cried and asked to be put back to sleep. The anesthesiologist put a mask on my face and asked my to count down from ten. I don't remember counting at all.
![]() |
| Post-op discomfort |
![]() |
| My daddy is the best |
After waking up and getting my stats up (blood pressure, oxygen sat, pulse) they sent me back to the surgical ward. There the nurses get me to go to the bathroom. They also make sure I can drink and eat without getting sick. And after they have observed me to see that I'm okay, they discharge me. My dad came to get me at 8 pm. He brought me a balloon, I love balloons.
When I got home, I went right to bed. My friend Carolyn came over to help care for me. At about 2 am, the nerve block in my knee wore off and I was in so much pain that I cried out loud for a few hours. The pain I felt was just as bad as my very first surgery, just as bad as when I was lying on that sidewalk with shattered bones. When Carolyn called the Telehealth nurse, she asked me to rate my pain. I used my 10. I never say 10 because what is I can have a worse pain. But this was blinding agony with no relief. I decided to take the max dose of painkillers. and it took the edge off just enough so I could sleep. But sleep was uneasy and the pain was almost unbearable.
February 2, 2015
Check Up
![]() |
| Surgery #2 Post-op X-ray |
Then it was Christmas. I made cookies for my family because I am a broke student. I spent my break relaxing and watching Netflix. I didn't go out much because I was still recovering from surgery.
![]() |
| One frame of my CT scan |
I got through the first month of the semester before my third surgery. Today I had my pre-op appointment with Dr Steeves. He explained to me that when I broke my ankle my fibula healed slightly shorter, probably by about 3-5 millimeters. Its not a huge difference, but it was enough to cause my pain and weird ankle alignment. He wasn't sure how to fix the problem in a way that wouldn't be too invasive and not require multiple surgeries, He said he had sleepless nights trying to figure out how to fix my ankle. So he brought my case to an surgical conference where top orthopedic guys (the kind who work on NFL super stars!!) consulted on my case . Together they came up with a plan.
- Open up my incision again and remove the rest of my old metal from the first internal fixation.
- Cut off the bone spurs and shave down the excess bone growth from the side of my fibula
- Go in with the arthroscope again, and cut out even more scar tissue
- Cut my fibula below the original break (called an osteotomy) Push the talus bone back into place. Insert a plate and pins through to my tibia to hold the pieces of the fibula in place so it heals longer
- On the left side of my ankle pull on on the ligament that has gotten stretched out over the last 10 months
December 7, 2014
Shout Outs!!
A huge thank you to the people who have helped me in the last few days: Shelby, Ester, Carley, Cassandra, Raiza, Fairy, Carolyn, Morgan, Andreane and Anngela. And a big thank you to my friends who visited and spent time with me: Sister Gentil and Sister Narraidoo, Tori, Levi, Nathan, Andrew, Chris, and Michael.
Surgery Round Two
![]() |
| Pre-Op |
And then the anesthesiologist came to see me. He went over the how they were going to freeze my leg at the knee so it would stay frozen until the next day. I have problems in the past with regular anesthesia, and so for my last surgery, they did a spinal anesthesia and there were no serious complications, so the doctors chose to do that again. Its a bit more risky, they put a needle right into my spine. It cuts off all sensation and nerves so I can't feel or move. Then they sedate me.
I agreed to all the procedures and signed their papers. Then they took me to the operating room. I was surprised by the number of people in there, at least 8 people in scrubs and gowns. They got me up on the table, and put something in my IV. I got a little dizzy. Then I had to sit up and bend over so they could do the spinal. It hurt. Then they lame back down and everything started moving fast.
![]() |
| Screen shots from the arthroscopy probe |
When I came to, I was crying about something. Not sure what. Anesthesia messes you up. The surgery had started at 11 and when I came to, it was almost 4pm. They had to put an oxygen mask on me because my blood oxygen level was low. I was having trouble breathing. Like it wasn't hard, I just wouldn't do it. Id doze off and my breathing would get super shallow and the number on the monitor would go down to 6 and 5. Other peoples monitors were at 15 and 16. So I was on the recovery ward for a couple hours. The moved me to Post Op after my oxygen levels came up, but still wouldn't let me go. My leg kept bleeding and they needed to change the dressing a couple times before it finally clotted. Finally they let me go after 8pm. My mom picked me up and took me home.
I couldn't put any weight on my leg for a few days. Since I no longer had roommates, I had friends coming over and taking shifts to stay with me, help me get to the washroom, and cook meals for me. On Saturday I started putting a little weight on my leg, but still used the crutches to balance. I hope to be off the crutches within the week. I have a follow up appointment in two weeks and I have to keep the bandages on until then. I also have to wear the Air Cast again. For eight weeks. Yay.
Today is Sunday. There is only one week of the semester left. I did a few of my finals early, and the rest I have extensions on. My term paper is due tomorrow but it was originally due last week. My portfolio final is due Tuesday but I got an extension until Thursday My photography final and design dynamics presentation are both due Friday. I have an extension on my drawing final so its not due until January. But my grade are all really high so I'm not worried. I go back to class on Tuesday.
Life goes on.

























